Getting Started - The Atari Times
The first article for TAT!by Gregory D. George
May 1, 1996![](images/jaguar/jaguar_sm.gif)
Welcome to the first issue (and article) of The Atari Times originally printed in May of 1996. The goal of this newsletter has always been to give Atarians something the other big publications haven't been: Coverage!
In my humble opinion, the magazines have never given Atari a fair shake. They may claim to be un-biased, but we just aren't convinced. Especially when they can't even get the sales figures right! (For proof of this bias, check out the EGM JagDoom review!)
You may recall back in mid- 1995 Atari released the now famous 150,000 Jaguars sold figure. Since then Atari has dropped the price of the Jaguar to $150 and more recently to $99. Now, wouldn't any reasonable journalist assume the 150,000 figure would be surpassed? Especially after 8 months and two price drops? Of course! But one writer even said Atari had only sold 50,000 Jags! Duh! What a moron!
My guess is after these many months and price drops Atari has sold 300,000 units or more. It's not the "stellar" figures of the other next generation machines, but it is still a respectable number.
The next thing the mags complain about is the lack of Jaguar software. Yet when games do arrive, they don't even bother to review them! Or they wait until the game has been on the shelf for two months leaving you to make a guess as to weather it's a good game or not.
What's worse is their reviews of games are 90% based on the graphics and 10% on funfactor. A prime example of this is BattleMorph for the Jaguar CD. This game is great fun, but because it's not totally texture mapped, some mags gave it crappy reviews!
I find it totally unfair how these magazines show disrespect to the founding father of video games. How many times do I have to read a contemptible article concerning Atari? How often has someone questioned the 64-bitness of the Jaguar? Aren't you sick of these mags kicking Atari when they're down?
Enough of this negative talk. Atari is what we're all interested in, and that's what The Atari Times is about. The reviews we give will be fair, and not automatically negative like the other publications. So trash those magazines who do nothing but kiss up to Sony, Sega, and Nintendo. The Atari Times is all the info you need for your hardware of choice!
Bro i am ji mmy you gotta listen to me before it s too lat e
i am ji m
What is the greatest video game company of all time? (Hint: Not Atari!)
This is your first warning for commenting off-topic content. If you do it again, I will ban you.
-Greg
I'm sorry, what? Are you giving me a warning? How cute. You can't do shit, You're a pathetic nobody! Even if you have my ip, that doesn't bother me at all. Now please step away from this thread and skedaddle, Gregory!
What is the greatest video game company of all time? (Hint: Sega!)
You have been banned for 1 day.
Reason: threatening a moderator.
Don't make me do this again.
-Greg
I'm still here, bucko. I knew that you couldn't do anything, even if you ARE a moderator! And just so you know, I did not THREATEN you, I MOCKED you. 2 Very different things! Now please leave me alone, I don't want to be involved in any of this.
hello im greg i uplifted your ban :)
Thanks for uplifting my ban, Greg Heffley! ;)
That was not me. I have perma-banned this user for impersonating a moderator. No further action is required. By the way, you're still banned, Jimmy.
-Greg
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Y U BAN HIM?!?!?!?! He was my friend, even if I only knew him for a few seconds! And by the way, I'm still not banned. I think that when you tried to ban me, you banned the first person here called Jimmy neutron. Boo-womp!
Can you unban him, Please?
I cannot do that. If I unban him, the damage he would do could be severe. I don't want that person posting nonsense under my name.
-Greg
Okay what the hell is all this
Understandable, but why are you picking on me specifically? Why can't you pick on Carl, or Sheen, or any of the others? Why does it have to be me?
I get that you're a moderator, and that you have to keep the place in order, but do you have to harass Jimmy like that? Why can't you harass us instead?
Yeah, mr. magic man! why don't you ban us instead!
I won't do that because I don't care about any of you. What I care about is banning Jimmy and putting an end to all of this.
We are SO much worse than what you're worrying about. In fact if this was happening in real life, I'd rip your limbs off instantly! And by the way, you forgot your signature.
You can't do anything. I have the power to ban all of you. Leave right now and nobody gets banned.
-Greg
Well I'm going to contact an admin here and tell them to unmod you!
@Bob
What do you want?
Bob, can you please unmod Greg? He has been harassing my friends a lot. Thank you.
Please don't do that.
-Greg
Looks like they already did it, Greg.
Ban us!
Go ahead, Greg! Ban us!
I bet you can't ban us, Greg [Not moderator]! Ban us!
STOP IT PLEASE.
I double dog dare you to ban us, Greg! Ban us!
I bet you couldn't ban us even if it meant free pie! Ban us!
Ban us, Greg! Ban us!
Ban us! Ban us!
Just ban us, ya wussy! Ban us!
FUCKING STOP. I CAN'T TAKE THIS STRESS ANYMORE. FUCK ALL OF YOU. I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL. I'M SHUTTING THIS WEBSITE DOWN SO THAT I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE ANY OF THIS ANYMORE. SO LONG, FUCKERS.
-Greg
...Ban us..?
I say I say we did it!
Let's gooooo!!!! I'm archiving all of this.
i'm sorry, but where did you come from?